It’s just one of those things, whenever I feel I’m entering a new phase, I need something to “usher it in”. Hence, new blog. I don’t think I ‘ll be coming back here. 

That said, I ‘m keeping my Greek blog for the time being. I ‘ve removed some posts from previous months- as I ‘ve mentioned before, I like travelling light.*

*Not to be confused with number/size of suitcases I take with me on the earth plane!

I ‘m trying to think positive but it’s not working. So I just thought I ‘d post something on this blog, just anything to keep my mind off the sensations…

I heard a clip of Fur Elise on TV earlier on and I remembered how special this piece has always been for me… And there’s something really interesting about it… When I was little, I took 6 years of on-off piano lessons. Two of those years were spent studying at home with a tutor, the other four I went to the local Conservatory. It was my dad’s wish that I took those piano lessons. I soon rebelled against that decision- I ‘d rather not go into all the details right now… So  the 6 years were not very productive because I refused to study. Still, by the age of twelve, I could play the piano quite well. At 13 though, I just put my foot down and told my dad flatly that I would not be going to the Conservatory anymore. I didn’t play the piano at all for many many years and managed to block out entirely all my musical knowledge. Now when I look at sheet music, I can’t read it… I ‘m not totally clueless but you get the idea. The strange thing though is that there is one piece of music that I can still read- and that happens to be Fur Elise. What I mean by that is that, when I see the sheet music for Fur Elise, I can read the notes and I start playing it. Some parts I know by heart but others it’s a case of reading them.  I can’t play it like a virtuoso, I mess up in certain places but for someone who plays no piano at all and hasn’t done so since the age of 13 more or less,  it makes you wonder…

So how come when I look at other sheet music, I get confused and need to go back to my books in order to read evry single note? And why is it that even when I do that, something in me shuts down and refuses to play the piece?

Beethoven is one of my favorite classical composers and Elise, that’s a name I love and feel connected to… but still, the whole thing is rather strange…

Oh, yeah, I realize it could be a past life connection… and I have a feeling as to what it might be… but it’s not as concrete as some of my other past-life memories… so I can’t say for sure…

Still an all-time favorite of mine.

I didn’t go to work today. Instead, I spent most of the day curled up on the sofa or sleeping. I didn’t take any medicine because I generally prefer allowing the cold/’flu to run its course. But in 36 hours from now I need to be well cause we have this photoshoot at work.

I ‘ll be thinking loving thoughts to the best of my ability – hopefully, it ‘ll all clear in time…

The fact that Diana was a descendant of hers makes it all the more interesting… and in many ways tragic. I happen to believe in ancestral patterns that persist in the course of a family’s history as a result of cellular memory. Until someone comes along and breaks the cycle. Did Diana do it? She came close but in the end, no, she didn’t. It seems she died before she could experience romantic fulfillment. Obviously, her relationship with that Pakistani doctor{I don’t remember his name right now, I ‘ll have to google him later} brought her a lot of joy but it was all cut short. The cycle would have been complete if she had lived with him happily ever after. In her case, I ‘m not sure how much she was to blame. From what I ‘ve read, it was him who broke it off because he didn’t want his career to be be overshadowed by his relationship with her if they were to go public. I do understand him up to a point, I really do but if he loved her, they would have found a way… I think he did love her but he just got scared… And so Diana thought that trying to make him jealous by going out with someone else would have brought him back to her. At least that’s been reported and somehow it seems very plausible. That’s understandable too. But look what happened…

The film itself was quite good but it got me very upset in the end. It  brought up a lot of negative feelings for me regarding romance, marriage, children etc. I don’t know how accurate the film was in depicting Georgiana’s life  but even if half of that story were for real, what an absolute disgrace for womankind. Now, Georgiana made her mistakes too- the fact that she married him to begin with. But also, sacrificing her love for Grey over her children. OK, I ‘m one of those women who don’t feel the need to have children in order to experience completion. But I believe that even if I did feel the need for motherhood and went on to have babies in an unhappy marriage/relationship, I still  would not give up on the love of my life without a fight. Especially if he was prepared to fight for me/us with the same passion. And Grey, in the film at least, certainly looked totally passionate.

No, I ‘ll just wait. I prayed this morning for guidance and asked for a sign. I actually asked for a sign in the next song that played on the radio. And the next song was “Don’t Worry, Be Happy”. So I guess even though I don’t always realize it consciously, stress plays a big part in this. I just have to bring worrying down to a minimum. Until one day I can eliminate it completely.

Oh, no, relax, I ‘m not going into some longwinded analysis of what it all means…

Just wanted to wish Happy V Day to all

{love this one… it was on the radio earlier on…}